March 25, 2006

Humor Me – The Final Reckoning

I may as well come clean. Yoshi-sama was never happy with “the mockery” as he puts it. These Jokes were recorded (with hardly any preparation) years ago for an internet radio show, and edited (with Chris Santamaria’s evil help) for maximum cheeseball effect. They’ve been reposted here over the last couple of months because: 1. I was lazy and it was easy for me to recycle old bits, and 2. he still makes me laugh.

Let me state for the record that Yoshi is a hilarious comic and a good friend, and I would never want to do anything to hinder his standup career, especially now that he’s hit the bigtime on the comedy circuit. As an example of his stalwart good nature, he’s never demanded censorship of these little retarded radio skits even though, as a professional, I’m sure they bug the fucking shit out of him. He suffers in silence; he endures. This man is pure class all the way.

So download them at will – because in April, these magificent, ridiculous Jokes will be gone, lost to the cruel heckles of history.

~~Yoshi’s final Joke of the Week~~

Rick at 12:30 am

Comments (1)

1 CommentÈ

Sweet Yoshi. Sweet Yoshi’s Joke of the Week. Though he has decided to leave, I am warmed that he’s going out on one of the best jokes so far. Mixing the personal and political, Yoshi spins a tale that will reverberate for years to come. Yoshi deftly jumps from the headlines in today’s newspapers to the tangled branches of his own family tree. The shift is effortless, though it spans several cultures and continents.

Let me explain. Yoshi enters your mindspace with what sounds like a typical American complaint. “I don’t like those Middle Eastern burners of [American] flags,” he [approximately] says, instantly gaining the sympathy of millions in this post-9/11 world. After all, who hasn’t shuddered at the animalistic, pyroclastic rituals played out daily in the dusty streets of rural, one-camel towns? With one sentence, you’re hooked. Yoshi has you, as surely and completely as a fisherman has ever had a fish. He plays you like a fish—a bitch fish.

But wait! Some crude, animal part of your brain-stem sounds a muffled alert, warning that this is a joke, after all, and it just might be a set-up. For better or worse, that primitive chunk of cortex, a gift from the dinosaurs, is what saves you from utter devastation when the second half of the joke arrives. And what an arrival it is!

Why? That’s the question! WHY! WHY does Yoshi hate seeing those burning American flags? You only assumed he hated it for the same reasons you hold. You ASSUMED Yoshi was just like you, with the same loves, desires, hates, and fears. In your rush to include this man as your ally, you ignored his past. You ignored his culture. You ignored the struggle and pain of an entire people.

The key is Yoshi’s grandmother. At some point in her life, she was obliged to work as a seamstress in a factory that produced flags. AMERICAN flags. The same flags that flutter beside porches, over perfect lawns, under rainbows of sprinkler mist all over the United States. These flags, which symbolize so much, have a dark history. These flags mean something quite different to people like Yoshi’s grandmother.

To Yoshi’s grandmother, the flags represent the reality of a distant nation which likes feeling good over doing good.

To Yoshi, those Middle Easterners are destroying something far more personal than a tawdry piece of cloth. They are destroying something far greater than Old Glory.

All those who were ready to cheer at the sound of their own opinions hollowly echoed yet againâ€“â€“put down your hands. Cover your eyes. And weep, if you still can.

Thank you, Yoshi. God bless.

Comment by Balb Kubrox Ñ March 28, 2006 @ 2:56 pm